Do you remember this little road trip we took?

Well, after a minor ‘mommy meltdown’ on Friday afternoon I decided to undertake a little solitary road trip on Saturday morning.  It wasn’t a selfish, idle pursuit either, I had stuff to do.

Um what? Did she say meltdown? What happened??

Okay, nothing too dramatic, I’d just had a freakishly bad nights sleep on Thursday night, so by Friday afternoon, I was ready to start swinging from the chandeliers anyway – so when Flipper started screaming for NO APPARENT REASON – or at least not one I’d managed to uncover anyway, and wouldn’t stop, not even when I used my primary ‘go to sleep arsenal’ which involves me singing a slowed down version of the NZ national anthem (yes I know the words – she says proudly) – and which is guaranteed to put both my kids to sleep because i sing it like a lullaby – anyway – when this didn’t work, and then Skippy started acting up TOO…JUST BECAUSE the baby was GETTING MORE ATTENTION THAN HIM…I started to slowly unravel, and ended up in a puddle of my own tears, and feeling, very, very, VERY sorry for myself.

To the point where at 17h00 when I really couldn’t take it anymore, and I rang hubby balling my eyes out asking if he was leaving work yet, because I could ‘really use a hand with the kids’ and instead of scoffing and telling that “I was the one who wanted to stay home with the kids.” he heard my desperation and immediately said, “I’ll be right there…with chocolate.” Thankfully his office is a scant 3km from our front door, and he arrived within 10 minutes with a large slab of top deck, and a hug.

To crown it all ===warning female content ahead…male readers continue only with extreme caution=== Aunt Flo has been making a complete nuisance of herself, and regularly turning up unannounced, and overstaying her welcome by at least 2-3 weeks, even though I’m on the pill.  I’ve had a word with my obgyn about it and because it’s happened two months in a row, she’s asked me to come and see her if it happens again this month, it’s either a)body settling down after pregnancy  b)body now requiring stronger pill than before pregnancy or c) benign polyp.   Please god, I’m hoping for a or b, universe you listening? Ok thanks.

So I’ve generally been run down, crabby and generally cranky, which is probably why the whole meltdown ocurred in the first place.  Isnt that funny though, in my darkest hour – what do I do??? Decide to start a new business – go me!

Anyhoo, with the thought of getting to Aus coming ever closer, I went and made sure our passports were all securely filed, and took mine out to have a look at.  Opening the last page (the photo page) I noticed that some DUMBASS at SAA had stuck our luggage claim tags (from our domestic flight JHB-CPT) from the return portion of our last trip to Aus, OVER my face. Why they’d even stuck it IN The passport is BEYOND me, but I’m street smart enough to know NOT TO QUESTION THE DARK, SECRET, AND MYSTERIOUS WAYS OF AFRICA.  Anyway, so of course I ripped off the offending luggage claim stickers, and managed to singledhandedly DESTROY all the essential information on that page.  Damnit. So now I need to apply for a new passport, when mine was just over 2 years old. DAMNIT.  Oh, and then I got an SMS from home affairs to say that my ID book was waiting for me in (small country town) where I’d applied for it, and if I did not come and collect it within 30days it would be sent back to Pretoria for destruction.  The fact that I actually PAID THEM TO POST IT TO ME clearly had not ocurred to them.

Hence. Road Trip.

Thus, hubby understood on Friday afternoon, when I asked him if he’d watch the kids for me the next morning, while I hopped in the car and drove the 60 odd kilometres to (small country town) to collect my new ID and apply for my new passport – and he readily agreed I could use the alone time.  Even just being able to blast MY music in the car and have all the windows open, and driving fast JUST BECAUSE I COULD was already making me feel better as I whizzed past impossibly green fields dotted with sheep and cows, cursing that I’d not thought to bring my camera with to try and capture the omnious grey thunderclouds on the horizon offset against the early morning sunlit hillsides.

I made good time into town, and was positively glowing when I arrived ON opening time exactly found the parking lot empty and was thus able to park RIGHT BY THE DOOR. Until I stopped the car properly, and saw the sign on the door.

Happy Womens Day.
Please note: This office will be closed on Saturday the 9th of August due to the public holiday of National Womens Day.

It was all I could do to not bang my head repeatedly into the steering wheel.

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• Please Stop with the Ex-Pat Bashing
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